Second Chance

All I ever wanted was love,
All you ever wanted was money.

I first saw you
filled with sparkles and light.

You saw me
chained with golden strings.

What attracted you?
Was it me?
Was was it my golden strings?
Or simply,
because you knew I would fall for you
not caring what your true intentions were?

Did you decide to play with me?
Are you still playing with me?
If I can say,
for all I can say,
Im waiting for you.

Just like how the wind changes directions,
I will let you play with me once more.
Whether it was the golden strings or me that attracted you, I will let it go
and turn myself in just like a criminal facing his punishment.

Because it wasn't me that left you in the snowing steps of december, and in the ignorant winds of June.

Nostalgic

Waves push upon the shore bringing surprises

that no other can imagine

Coconut trees lean against the shallow part of the ocean,

trying to listen to the soft

unbearable

splashing noises

Waves overlap one another as if they were fighting for air as

Winds start distracting the leaves as if it were its prey

and next to it

the sun returns back to its home after its evening job

As if it was an emergency

people that has once flooded the area

fled to their homes,

spending the remaining time

sheltered under the moonlight

But one couple

just remains their

as if

they had all the time in the world

They walk side by side

for no one knows the reason why.

They look over

catching a glimpse of a shallow light

looking as if their history were filled with this area

But who knows

that will remain a mystery.

It's time

Trees fades into the loneliness of the world  

as the sun sets

ready to repose

for tomorrow's day

Leaves withered like a man who has lost in his fight

covering the tracks of the railroad

covering the path

of the home

of others

As greens of the leaves become shallow

darkness invades

as if

there is no such thing

as privacy

Everything disappears

the tree that swayed with the wind

the railroad that is filled with people during the morning rush

Trusting a cat to a youthful man

 If cats can claw,
I can move.

If you saw me,
hidden behind the broken branches
Clicking every step with careful doe-like eyes.

You're exposed under my eyes,
your every move and thoughts
predictable.

You're vulnerable,
I'm surprised.
Step by step you go
From trashes to gold,
from paper to glass.

You surprise me
yet again
your vulnerability never left you.

 Crowded with scarecrows,
filled with liquid
just
how well do you know yourself?

No matter how long I've moved with you
Like a cat following its prey,
you get me by surprise
like a mouse coming out of its hiding.


So how well do you know yourself like I do?
You dont know yourself like I know you.



Surprised again.

 You're always outside the fields.
Im always inside the library.

Your always looking at the ball.
I always stare at you move.

My time is running out
just like the speed of your falling sweat.

How you wipe your sweat with your arms,
with soft, caring movements.

Will you wipe my pain and tears away

or
Will you wipe my whole existence off like a little droplet of sweat that was nothing but a bother?

You play for hours and hours
smiling, tackling, shouting.
Will I ever see them again the same way?

I see myself smiling,
my time flying pass.
But looking at you,
time never came in my head
and I only manage to lose my hand to the window where you stand.

My hand,
your figure.
My time,
your smiles.
So different yet similar.
So near yet so far by heart.

I have never talked to you,
you have never seen me.
There was no such thing as luck
until
i saw you turn your head for the first time with curiosity
in the library window where my hand lay.

I only managed to chuckle a small laugh
that swallowed me up,
choking me in my down desire.

I see you turn back,
aiming for the last goal,
the last shot of my final wish.
So similar yet so different.
So near yet so far by heart.

Raining With No Rain

If I had a choice. A choice that can change everything from my past to future. Would I take that choice?
No. Although half of my life has been filled with regrets, I have not once thought about changing the events that have already happened. They made the present me. They made my friends. They made my education. I dont want to return them back for a different set. Im happy with what I have and no matter how many more regrets I will face in the future, the choice I make here is loud and clear; If you ask me if i ever want to change ANYTHING in my life, my answer to you is a "no". I already cried my heart and I already reopened my wound but I have friends and my family that are willing to heal them and most of all I have time to patiently wash away the dirt in my head. Unlike you, You push others behind you, ignoring them as if you are the only person in the world feeling pain. You only think for yourself and what nothing but pity. Take your pity because I dont need it, I have better things to do than worry about my past because I know that someday the past will be my future obstacles. If you understand what I'm trying to say, Ill see you in the future with more smiles and thoughts while you strangle to keep up with you past regrets. Dont bring me back, because what you are doing wont affect me but will only affect you.

The sky with no clouds

Sometimes I would sit down and wonder,
look across the glowing light.

I would think and think,
"If you were me,
would you change everything that you found unworthy?"

Sometimes I would stare right at you
and wonder why.
Why your face always differ from what you say.

Why am I just standing here
right in front of you,
trying to uncover the truth behind everything
as you hide behind your lies and reality?

Why should I stand here,
your words passing in and out,
starring right at you with glassy eyes that can
melt the burning fire yet
slowly kill myself inside?

Let me wish you one thing and one thing only.
Dont fool me with your act, dont fool me with you words.
Because I'll tell you once,
I already know what you've been thinking and I'm not afraid because
if you were me, I doubt you would change your mind.

Passion

What am I?
Am I just a rock
that was hard to pile?

What am I?
Am I a trampoline
that pushes you up when you've fallen down from the sky?

What am I?
Am I a soft cushion that embraces you from the darkness
while I suffer the sight of seeing you with someone else?

Tell me,
I want to know.
What am I to you?
A rock?
A trampoline?
A soft cushion?
Or
Am I just that someone
in your life that can melt like an ice cream
and not be bothered to be wiped off with a tender tissue?

Am I someone,
Am I that someone
Whose not worth another glance?

You gave me the ice cream
I questioned you
But
You only looked back at me
with a blank stare that only reflect
the melting ice cream.

Uncovering the other side

I've known you:
As a volcano knows the diverse hues of its lava;
As the Arctic misses its floating iceberg.

I've seen you before,
gliding down on each step like a leaf falling to its end
Like the golden token of peace, you shine
as bright as the moon that illuminates the path of a hungry tiger.

I've seen you before
walking down the road
Heads down
Hands on pockets
Trying to hide the exposures of your bare skin
Only managing to
Leave a small trace of regret and jealousy
and nothing more.

I want to see you,
your true self,
the real intentions,
let the icy glacier of smoke lift from you
and
let the light erase your fear.

Theres no turning back,
I am
where you belong.
So leave it be,
let the entire ice float out of the Arctic.
Let the lava sprout with its diverse colors from the volcano.

I've known you so clear
as the mirrors were reflecting me.

Have you ever placed your cup of coffee on top a a tissue. Looked outside the windshield and stare at people crossing by. To pick of your cup and look down only to find its layer printed to the tissue. Thats my life right now. Someone picked me back up to reality and it wasn't a good knock but a harsh one. They told me the truth of relations  (obviously I figured majority of it by myself.) and now I'm in the middle of looking back at my life to check for some mistakes. Well, first things first, I cant help but spot so much mistakes rather than correct actions. Why? Childish? Arrogant? Selfish?

Apparently, its a "yes" to all of them.  As shocking as it seems, we all have that aspect in our humane traits. We have the burning sensation to be a child in front of someone you want to be with. We keep our thoughts to ourself and ignore people and their words no matter how much they come knocking into your door and beg for you to change. We are selfish. Right there, selfish, we are selfish. Whatever we do we want more. Just because you let someone take half of your candy does not mean you are not selfish. Why? Simply because you have a hidden action towards this movement. You want people to know how generous you are. Sadly, some people misuse people like them and take control, which is NOT the best path anyone would want to take.

Im not saying Humans are bad. Im just saying Humans are being Humans. Humans all have that characteristics and the only thing that differs between all of us is how much we control or let out our emotions and motives.


So lets say this, if humans were to look back like the wet marking left on the tissue, we would find mistakes that we would want to fix, hide or forget. Unfortunately, there is no such thing as a "reset" button in life, however there is always a "start anew" button. Don't dwell in those past mistakes and just accept the fact that it happened and continue on with your life because there will be a time where you will be able to fix it.

One last thing, the tissue with the wet marking got thrown into the trash. The person doesn't need it for it would only bother her.

Introduction to blog(?)

Have you ever crossed a road and stopped in the middle thinking, "Why am I here?". Well maybe thats a sign saying you should come here. Im not the brightest person however, I could tell you little bits of my life that may or may not help you cross the other half of the road.